Late Night Blogging

IT's almost 5am and I'm in one of those "can't fall back to sleep" moods. Lately, I've been having problems with waking up (usually do to my night owl husband) when there are loud noises. I tired to fall back to sleep but my mind starts to race before I can shut it off. I tried taking a bath to relax, but no luck.

While I was in the tub I was thinking about my pregnancy up to this point and how much I have NOT enjoyed it. I feel some women find this their time to shine, to embrace the process of life. I feel like a frumpy, tired, emotion hag. I wonder if I would be able to enjoy it more if I wasn't so over worked with full-time school and work. However, that is neither here nor there. I just feel like there is no time to enjoy the process, no time to breath or just be with myself and body. My meditation teacher said a quote today that really rang true for me "he lived a few steps away from his body." This could easily be said of me too.

As I sat in the tub tried to think about all the pros and my list consisted of: a new experience in life and the excitement of when I feel Hoju kick.

My Cons were much greater in length including: fatigue, acid reflux, sinus congestion and nosebleeds and hormonal. The list goes on, but for the sack of trying to become more positive I won't go into it.

I need to find a good balance so I don't look back at this time and think "why didn't I take the time to enjoy this once in a lifetime experience?" It's just hard when I'm trying to pay the bills and ensure a better future for me and my family. When do I find time to smell the roses? Or maybe all the roses went away...